Thursday, January 26, 2006


A quick chronology of the state of our toilets, as follows:

  • Two weeks ago, two of our three toilets stopped up on the same day for no apparent reason. We got them unclogged by ourselves, but one of them has continued to back up approximately once a day.

  • On Tuesday the plumber sent out by the home warranty people arrived to tell us that the problem wasn't some kind of stoppage, it was that our toilets were worn out.

  • Upon notifying the warranty people of this, they said that because technically nothing was broken on the toilets, they'd be damned if they'd switch them out (I'm paraphrasing here). But they did give me the option of getting a second opinion from another plumber.

  • Today I called the second plumber and they sent someone out. The same day! Which was great, but I didn't get a chance to get everything out of the bathroom that hadn't been installed there.

  • The plumber was extremely nice and seemed to know his stuff, approaching our recalcitrant toilet as a personal challenge. He also stuck his BARE HAND in a stopped up toilet!!! Everything had gone down several flushes ago, but STILL!

  • And then he used our phone! And he didn't wash his HANDS!

  • While I would like to think I am not a complete germophobe (after all, I am the mother of preschoolers), I am thinking these list items do not accurately convey my utter and complete horror.

  • Do you have any idea how hard it is to memorize everything someone else has touched in order to surreptitiously follow around behind him with an antibacterial wipe?


  • He was very thorough and did achieve his objective after using 1) an auger, 2) taking off the toilet to check the trap, and 3) using an auger again. He also used up 1.5 rolls of toilet paper in the evaluation and eventual remedying of the issue. He was also very splashy and drippy.



  • I even pointed out our sink and soap "in case" he wanted to wash his hands. His response was that it was "clean water" and it couldn't be that bad if dogs drink out of toilet bowls. Nevermind that dogs do lots of disgusting things I would never do. With "clean water" like that, who needs raw sewage?

  • Our housekeeper was here on Tuesday, so the bathrooms started out unusually clean. However, after the plumber left today, I spent a good bit of time wiping down every surface in two bathrooms with a disinfectant wipe to counteract any possible plunger splashes. For Pete's sake, I put my pajamas on that toilet lid!

  • I know it takes an extremely high tolerance of disgusting things to be a plumber. Heaven knows, they play a critical role in society. I am very grateful for the guy today who seems to have solved a major problem in our household.

    I'm just glad they make washing machines for rugs and disposable disinfectant wipes for everything else. And I'm throwing away the magazine that was on top of the flush box, and which is now drenched with highly suspect water.

    Just last week Nate mentioned how cool he thought it would be if we could see germs with the naked eye. I, for one, am ECSTATIC that we can't.

    1 comment:

    Anonymous said...

    Hi AMy,
    OK I don't know if I should read your Blog while I'm eating lunch anymore! Too Funny.
    Love, Cathy